On Sunday, Caroline drew Jason a picture at church and asked if we could take it to him after lunch. So we drove out to the cemetery and placed the picture under the vase at his marker. She then went to a nearby bench and sat down and cried. As we sat together, everything (or almost everything) came tumbling out that she had been feeling since Jason's passing. You see, she wouldn't talk about him at all. Her comments ranged from, "I feel bad because on the day he was home I went to play at my friend's house and daddy was gone when I got home." to "Everybody has a daddy but me." to "I didn't want to see daddy go into the ground so that's why Nanna and I walked around." We talked and I tried to help her understand that nothing that she did was bad or wrong. Daddy understood. The rest of the day she was rather quiet except when she was about to go and spend the night at her friend's house. She was excited about that.
Caroline was excited about that and had been for quite some time. She has always been the one to sleep over at friend's houses, while Jack was the homebody. So I dropped her off and went on my merry way, excited for the little bit of time along (Jack had gone out to the country with Pa to shoot his pellet gun). However, at 8:45, Caroline called to say goodnight. Then at 9:30 she called again saying she wanted to come home. I talked to her for a little bit to see if she was just tired or if something had happened but according to her she "missed her house." So Jack and I got in the car and went to pick her up. As soon as she got home, she climbed into bed and went to sleep. So now she's turning into the homebody.
Jack, the homebody, successfully spent the night at the Cub Scout campout without me. Then when we were at the cemetery he announced that he had to use the restroom. We were in the middle of the cemetery and I was in the middle of talking with Caroline, so we were in a dilemma. Until, that is, he announced that the main building was open and it had a bathroom. Now, usually when that solution comes up I get (from him), "But mommmmmmm, you have to go with meeeeeeeee!" This time, however, I got, "It's not far, so I'll go ahead and go and you can stay here and talk with Caroline." Sure enough he turned around and walked to the bathroom. Now he's independent.
Monday, June 14, 2010
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