What dreams may come.

Last night I was really tired.  This week has been a series of parent meetings, work meetings, data analysis, and grumpy kids.  The cherry on top of the cake was that a student accused my daughter of being a bully.  Boy was that a fun conversation with the counselor.  From what I can gather, the student was about to get in trouble and pulled Caroline's name out of the air.  However, the ramifications for Caroline ruined her evening.  Anyway.  I ended up going to bed last night late.

I'm not sure if I had a dream about Jason or simply had  a memory, but either way, it ended up a dream.  In my dream, Jason came through the bedroom door after a late poker night with the guys.  These guys were friends of him from McKinney, and one had been friends with him since his days at HPPM.  Of course it was late, but everything seemed so real.  His "attempt" to be quiet, not realizing I was already awake (I always tried waiting for him so that I knew he'd returned safely).  He climbed into bed, fell asleep and all was well for a little bit.  Then, just as it always happened, he was in the bathroom throwing up.  He ate very well normally, but on nights when he hung out with the guys playing poker he ate out of character.  It always sat heavy on his stomach, so inevitably after returning home, I'd wake up hearing him puking in the bathroom.  He was considerate and always turned on the faucet, but I could still hear him.  He could make himself throw-up, a skill I don't have.  It was not beneficial the day he died, in that when they intubated him, he threw up.  Part of that was pushed into his lungs and contributed to the aspiration pneumonia that was the cause of death.

Having said all that, I thought I heard him in my dream in our bathroom throwing up after a night with the guys.  Then he walked into the bedroom and said, "I just threw up.  Can I stay home from school?"  I thought it was a little weird that Jason had asked that, but I responded sure, just clean up the sink and get back to bed.  A little while later, I heard a door shut, and throwing up.  I then saw Jason in the room, but this time he had Jack's voice.  He said, "Mom, I threw up again.  Can I stay home tomorrow?"  Sure, honey, just clean up the mess and get back to bed.  Then I don't remember anything.

This morning, my sister informed me that the hall bathroom sink that the kids use was nasty gross with throw up.  She cleaned it up, and checked on Jack.  He informed her that he had thrown up twice last night, and that each time I told him to clean it up and get back to bed.  He had tried to clean it up, but you know how teenage boys are.  But he told me that his dad had rubbed his back while he threw up, so he wasn't sure if he actually threw up, or if he dreamed it because his stomach hurt this morning.  She told him that, yes indeed, he had thrown up but not to worry because she'd taken care of it.  Caroline then came in to check on him and said that her dad had come into her room and told her to give Jack a hug this morning because he wasn't feeling well.  She even offered to have Nana take her to Apollo so she could get his absent work.  Such a sweetie.

Thanks for visiting Jason, do you think next time you could clean up the vomit?