Dating (in Junior High and High School) is for practice only. Heed the lessons young Grasshopper.

Now that Jack is old enough to understand the whole "dating thing", we have had several discussions on what exactly dating is supposed to be in Junior High and High School.  I know that I'm living in a dream world of what I would like to have happen (he doesn't date AT ALL until he has that degree in hand), so I try to be honest about my feelings on dating in junior high.  Basically, here's what I've told him:

   * School is your number one priority...School doesn't come easy for him, he has to work at it, so having too many distractions aren't good (and that includes football).

   * Girls (and I know) can be little game players in Junior High and High School.  I have two sisters, and being the introvert that I am I do quite a bit of people watching.  I have told Jack on several occasions, that if the drama gets to be too much it's time to call it.

   * Dating (in Junior High and High School) is for the sole purpose of figuring out what qualities you like in a person and which ones you can't stand.  Now sometimes, but not often, that special someone can be found in high school.  You can't tell in Junior High if the person you're dating is THE ONE, because heck, you haven't even decide which Xbox One game to buy.

   * Dating during the ages of 13-18ish, is for the sole purpose of practice.  You learn how to treat a lady, and how to argue with them.  I reassure him that he will never know what really goes on in a girl's mind, (so don't even try to figure it out) but that you can't treat them the same way you treat your guy friends. For example,  your friend texts you and you're in the middle of hanging out with your cousins.  You look at the text, and then put the phone away to continue playing with your cousins.  You text your friend back about four hours later, picking up on the conversation that he originally texted you.  No problem, he's cool with it.  HOWEVER, substitute friend for girlfriend and it's a whole different scenario.  With the girlfriend, you text back immediately and say something to the effect of..."Hey, I'm with my cousins, I'll get back to you."  Then you can pick up the scenario from your friend.

So last night, here's what happened (I'll just give the breakdown to save time):
      * 10:30 pm - He comes into the room with his phone, which is ringing, and says..."This person keeps calling me but the Caller ID is blocked so I don't know who it is.  What should I do?"  So I tell him that the next time that happens, to bring me the phone and let me answer it.  Does he do that? Nope, he doesn't.  He answers it and it goes down hill from there.  Supposedly, and I mean supposedly, it's a girl that went to the school that I teach at (she's now in 8th grade at an area Junior High).  So I go to sleep, because after all, mystery caller problem is solved.

   * 2:00 am - The boy comes into my room and wakes me up and says, "Help! I've really messed up and I don't know how to fix it."  Turns out he went on to some app and created an account so that he could text back and forth with this girl.  He figured something fishy was going on and was trying to figure out  exactly what.  BIG MISTAKE!  Turns out this girl was sitting right next to his girlfriend, and she was reading exactly what Jack was sending this other girl.  (At least I think that's what was going on). Unfortunately, Jack's abilities as a spy are greatly under-minded by the fact that he's 13 years old and has no experience with dealing with 13-14 year old girls and their mind tricks.

But this is where it gets me mad as the mom...The texts that went back and forth were basically the girlfriend not giving Jack the chance to explain, and when he did, shooting him down.  There were some mean things said about him that were not warranted, and the feelings that it invoked in him were heartbreaking (as a mom).  But then, the Tiger part of mom came out and we talked about (as he was texting back and forth) whether or not this "relationship" was worth it.  Because by then, it had become apparent that his girlfriend and set him up in this situation to "test" him.  Just when he sent the text that said that if she wasn't going to trust him and constantly set him up to test him, the relationship wasn't worth it.

 That's when the truth came out...she was pranking him.  That's right, while she and her friend were giggling on the other end, my son was honestly upset that she was mad at him and that she wasn't going to be his friend.  That ticked me off as a mom.

So here's what Jack learned (or should have learned) from last night:

1. Nothing, and I mean nothing, good happens after midnight (in junior high.  The time increases as you get older).

2. Don't ever try to be a detective (unless you're trained) and figure out what is going on with another girl.

3. Don't ever do anything, when you're in a relationship, that will hurt your partner.

4. Argue fair.  No cheap shots.

5. No girl is ever, and I mean EVER, prettier than the one you're dating.  (The mystery girl asked him this and he said that she was pretty.  Didn't say she was prettier than his girlfriend, but as we all know, that doesn't matter).

6.  Girls can be insecure, just know it and deal with it. (Unless it becomes a problem).

7. When two or more junior high girls get together for a sleepover, there can be trouble.

Things are fine between them now, but Jack is a little gun shy. I hope I can make it through the dating phase.  Last night was rough.