If it wasn't sad, it'd be funny

Tonight when my sister came by I found out something that under normal circumstances would be funny. But alas, my family's experiences aren't normal, so this was kinda sad. Looking back on it it, it's funny but at the time it scared Caroline.

Apparently, last night was a bit rough.  The kids are taking their district simulations this week and its never fun.  Jack always has stomach issues so that will wake him up, but last night it was WINDY so at one point I guess he was coming out of his dream state and heard the wind in the trees outside his window and it woke hm up.  Caroline, for some reason, had trouble sleeping as well.  At one point she came in to tell me about a bad dream she'd had but couldn't wake me.  She panicked because i usually wake up, so she went into my sister's room and told her she couldn't wake me up and thought I was dead.  Knowing full well that I wasn't, my sister still got up to come check.  But apparently I got cold last night and buried myself under the covers and was hugging the body pillow, so my sister didn't think I was even in bed.    She didn't want to wake me so she'd left the lights off.  She thought I was in the bathroom so she knocked on the bathroom door and called my name,  but I mumbled from the bed.  She took that to mean I was, indeed, alive and explained that to Caroline who was standing by the bedroom door, apparently afraid to come in.

I laughed at the story, but at the same time knew how badly it had scared Caroline.  Since Jason died, the kids are always afraid that I will die also.  They know someday I will, but are hoping I'm really old when it happens.  It's hard on them if I get sick, because mom's aren't supposed to get sick.  But then again, dads aren't supposed to die at the age of thirty eight either.

If it wasn't so sad, it'd be funny.